Death of a Lemon Thingy

I’ve never claimed to be a good cook.

In the kitchen I just fake it.

But that Keto friendly lemon thingy,

Well, I thought I’d try and bake it.

It’s made from scratch, not a mix,

So I tried to get into the groove.

I measured, mixed, stirred and blended,

But this shit just wouldn’t get smooth.

So I shoved the damn thing in the oven,

Set the timer and hoped for the best.

An hour later, this shit’s still runny.

Is this some sort of a test?

Three hours later, the middle’s still wiggly

And the lemon’s not even zingy.

This frosting shit needs cut with a knife.

It’s the death of a lemon thingy.


Written by Taffy O’

In the Night

In the midst of the night

The Dark Prince, he takes flight

In search of his fair skinned maiden

Her senses aware

She feels his presence there

While lying in the night waiting

The young maiden has no fear

As her Dark Prince does appear

Yet wonders is this but a dream

They gaze into each other’s eyes

As if passionately hypnotized

She is too entranced to scream

Then with one fleeting bite

The two own the night

Locked in eachother’s embrace

Yet with the rising sun

The Dark Prince he is gone

Leaving not a trace

But the mark upon her soul

From whence the passion did unfold

And this fair skinned maiden

Her senses aware

She feels his presence there

While lying in the night waiting

written by Taffy OKelly

Dear Mother

As I remember you today

I reflect on tales of the motherland

From folklore of headless dog spirits

To the meaning of the shamrock and the Trinity

A cottage in which 11 children grew

In a land the beauty of which I have never seen

I remember the music, the dancing of the jig

The tales of the leprechaun and his pot of gold

I think of the courage it took to leave your family

To come to a strange land and start anew

The strength it took to have 10 children of your own, yet bury 3

The stern hand with which you raised us

Was also the gentle hand that guided us with love

The firm voice that called our names down the line

Could be soft and comforting at any moment

In our big house filled with love, and lots of children

I think how you truly came to this country with nothing

And really did achieve everything

And you carried yourself with grace and dignity while doing so

All these things and more I remember

As I remember you today

Dear Mother

The S Word….written by TaffyOKelly

Out the window I take a fleeting glance
And by chance I happen to see
Beautiful fluffy flakes of white
Staring back at me
Like artful billowy pillows
Floating all around
Or sparkly little fairies
Dancing to the ground
And as I watch in amazement and awe
Of such a glistening sight
I can’t help but wonder
What in the hell is this shit?
snow what 2015 014


The greatest man I ever knew

Lived at 414 Richmond Avenue.

LaGrange Park, IL was the town

Where this man so world renown

In the beautiful ballroom would entertain

When he wasn’t driving the Sante Fe Train.

He would play the guitar and he would sing.

When he tickled the ivories, he made them ring.

Friends and family would gather around

Just so they could hear the sound

Of the piano playing and the songs he sung.

I’d sit right by him, I was so young.

I was amazed and perhaps in awe

Of this great man, Harry Roland, my grandpa.

Sometimes he’d do little magic tricks,

I’d watch real close because he was quick.

Then I’d look at him and say

“Grandpa, how’d you do that anyway?”

And, of course, he wouldn’t tell,

Not wanting to break his magic spell.

He loved entertaining everyone.

He was so cool and so much fun.

I remember we went for ice cream one day,

We stopped at the bank along the way.

The teller said she’d like one too,

So he dropped her ice cream at the drive thru.

I guess, at heart, he was a big kid

Who enjoyed life and all he did.

But grandpa was also very wise.

I could always go to him for advice.

He lived life to the fullest, right up to the end.

He was my hero, confidant, friend.

Then one day my grandpa was gone.

He’d played his last tune, sung his last song.

He was very unique in his own way

And I love and miss him still to this day.

I carry his memory deep in my heart,

So we’ll never be truly apart.

And if I close my eyes I can see

Grandpa at the piano, singing to me.

Written by Taffy OKelly 5-17-1999

Guys Are a Dime a Dozen

Guys are a dime a dozen and this girl’s got plenty of dimes. So, I’ll pay out my dime, go thru my dozen and toss those guys one at a time.

This world is full of frogs, will I ever find a prince? The thought of kissing all these frogs really makes me wince.

There are more pebbles in the sand, and plenty of fish in the sea. I think I’ll go start a band, write a song and go out and make some money.

Taffy OKelly 3-27-14

Ice Ice baby

Yo, I C E, lets salt it

Ice Ice baby

I’m sick of Ice Ice baby

All right stop

I’ve had enough this Winter

The ice is back & I’d rather have a splinter

Someone grab hold of me tightly

Before I fall on the ice & land on my hiney

Will it ever stop

Egads I hope so

Be careful outside and walk real slow

The city is out of salt, it’s a scandal

Oh how I long for spring & my sandals


But don’t do it outside

Cause your bum will hurt if you fall on the ice

I don’t love it, I hate it

Will it ever go away

It better melt soon

That’s all I can say

It’s a slippery problem

And the city can’t salt it

I’m headed outside and hope I don’t fall-it’s

Ice Ice baby

I’m sick of Ice Ice baby

Lestat the Vampire Cat

Lestat the pussy vampire cat

Intimidating in his size

At first glance this vampire cat

Will cast fear into your eyes

But looks can be deceiving

As the ferrets cause him to hide

And Lennon the tiny puppy

Makes him tremble inside

The thought of blood makes him cringe

So he won’t bite your neck

What kind of vampire cat is he

He is a nervous wreck

Lestat the pussy vampire cat

Intimidating in his size

At first glance this vampire cat

Will cast fear into your eyes

Taffy OKelly 2-1-14