I had a dream last night that I had to drive to 414 Richmond Ave to meet up with my uncle Pat. For those that don’t know, that particular location holds a lot of great memories for myself and the rest of this family, as it was an intricate part of our lives. It was my grandpa’s house.
I rush in to find my Grandma Polly sitting in the living room waiting on Pat. “He’s running a little late.” she said. Suddenly, he comes running in the front door apologizing for his unusual lateness. It seemed he had been having a sleep study to find the source of his suddenly acquired, intense snoring. However, after hours of being hooked up to machines, and having experienced, very possibly, the least restful sleep he had ever had (after all, who can sleep hooked up to all that) he didn’t snore once.
He was wanting to show me all the changes done to the house. Off of the living room used to be a bedroom, and that had been turned into a 4 season room with big windows. The bathroom was still just off that room. The main bedroom at the front of the house was still there, but had a big chandelier in it.
As we walked down the hallway, he explained that the tenants were on their way back, and if anyone asked, his name was Harry Ashton, and grandma Polly was Nora Ashton.
We walked into the bedroom at the end of the hall, and much to my surprise found 2 cribs and a toddler bed all with sleeping babies. Then he showed me the main bathroom, which had been made much, much bigger. It had a shower and a jacuzzi type tub installed. suddenly I look up and realize an upstairs had been added, and there is yet another bathroom above us. I see water streaming down, like a waterfall. “Hey Mr. Ashton, is that water supposed to be coming down like that?” I asked. Well, no, it wasn’t, so that was something to notate for when the tenants arrived.
As we entered the kitchen, the tenants arrived, and the waterfall in the bathroom issue was discussed. The kitchen was all modernized and no longer had that red brick effect on the walls. Suddenly, there were 4 dogs at the back door wanting to be let out. As I go to let them out, 4 cats come out of nowhere, so I had to fight to keep them in. The yard was all fenced in, but someone had left a gate open, so 2 dogs got out. We go to catch them, only to find them across the street, and someone else was rounding up loose pets, because a fence had been cut. As I was going to grab the dogs, I was followed by another dog, a pony, a baby elephant and a lion.
I go back in the kitchen and realized I had to leave right away because I had to be to work in 4 hours and it takes me 3 hours to get home. So, I grabbed my Mt. Dew and hit the road.
I’m somewhere, walking on a sidewalk alongside a brick road lined with nothing but hostas…but purple hostas. There are hostas everywhere, lining the sidewalks, in yards…even the cars and motorcycles have these hostas on them. I’m trying to find the hotel where I am staying.
I call my sister. She said “I’m at work, so I can’t talk.” To which I respond “But, where am I?” She said “I don’t know, you tell me.” To which I respond “I don’t really know, but I think I’m in New Orleans.”
Then as I walk past another house, I see a woman get shot by some creepy little dude, who just looks at me, waves and leaves. I call my sister again and tell her “Not only do I think I’m in New Orleans, but I think I just saw someone get shot in the face.” To which she responded “You know, I work in a lawyer’s office, and you just can’t call me at work.” I replied “But you drive a schoolbus!” And she responded with “Yeah, but we park them at the lawyer’s office.”
I decide to go into the house where the woman appeared to be shot, and find someone I went to high school with. We decide to look in the adjacent home, because she thinks it may have happened there. We could not find the woman, nor could we find any blood or proof of a shooting, but we did find a room filled with cat pee and cat poop.
I then say to her “Well, it’s ok, because I think this is just a dream anyway.” We walk outside, and right next to us is a lot full of food trucks. I said to her “Oh, wow…food trucks, we just got those in Davenport, Ia.” She replied, “Yes, I read that, but our food trucks are better.” At a table by the food trucks were the friends that I went to New Orleans with, some dressed in costumes. They saw me and asked “Where the hell have you been?” I responded “Oh, you know, wondering around, looking a hostas, watching someone get shot…that sort of thing.”
I found the hotel, and we went off touring the area on foot, starting out at a mansion that my friend and her husband had been to years prior where he had obtained a lot of old tools and duct tape.
Ok, last night I dreamed that I was taking photos at a wedding. Before the ceremony took place, the groom’s ex wife spoke, giving her approval and blessing to the union. After the ceremony, someone said there was a criminal running around loose. They thought he was in the church. So, the groom and myself went on a chase. We followed the trail of this guy through fields and woods into a clearing, where we found an elaborate set up of triangular shaped whatever the hell they were. Evidently, that was a trap, which we avoided. The criminal was found and caught, and the groom rented a car for himself, the new wife and the kids while I stayed behind and re-arranged all the plants. I swear, I did not eat cheese before I went to bed.
I am standing in my living room, but everything has been moved around. My curio cabinet is in the middle of the room, tipped over and half it’s size. The fireplace is over by the kitchen doorway, and the tv is where the curio cabinet used to be, only it’s in pulled out away from the wall about 3 feet. I can’t quite figure out who did it, and nobody will admit to it. So, I decide I’m going to go into the bathroom to take a shower.
I leave my living room and suddenly I am in the hallway of another building, looking for my bathroom. There are people wandering around, and point me in the direction of my bathroom which is in this other building. While entering the bathroom, I see someone walking a young gorilla. “What is this place?” I ask, and am told that it is a place for special gorillas who learn to communicate with sign language. Essentially, it is gorilla college.
As I close the bathroom door behind me, I realize I am in my parents’ old bathroom. I thought to myself this is fine because I know this bathroom. Suddenly, there is an alarm going off. This giant gorilla, who was called Kong…(go figure)…got loose, and he’s scared and he’s ginormous. Well, that’s just great because I can’t possibly take a shower with a giant gorilla running around.
So, I run back to my living room and say “Ok, we gotta go. The only place I can take a shower is in Port Byron, IL.” So, we jump in the car and drive. On the way, we have discovered that the highway is leading to unknown territory and all the signs are gone. We have no idea where we are going, and I said “Great…how the hell am I gonna get my shower now?”
I ended up in my parents’ old basement where, lo and behold there was a shower. Not only was there a shower, but there was also a secret room way in the back of the basement where people would go to work.
Conversation at the eye doctors with 2 random strangers (older women sitting across from me) went something like this: 1st older woman yawns while having a conversation with her friend. I then yawn. 1st older woman says “It’s catching….sorry I should not have yawned.” I said “Yes, it’s contagious, but I’m getting older, so I yawn a lot more now.” 2nd older woman says “Oh, you have a long way til you are old.” I say “Well, in my head, I’m still 30, but my body is starting to tell me otherwise.” 2nd older woman says “Oh, 30….that was 60 years ago for me.” Well, I wasn’t sure I heard her right….because that would make this woman 90 years old. She certainly did not look 90, and even though she used a walker, she was gettin’ around pretty darned good. So, I flat out responded, sounding rather shocked, “60 years ago? No way! No way!” 1st older woman giggled and said “Yes way…she’s 90.” I replied “You’re pulling my leg.” 2nd older woman said “No, I’m 90.” I just plain said “Well, you look great! And honestly, I would have guessed you at 75.” Needless to say, she was thrilled, and proceeded to talk to me about how she stays so young. She worked til she was 80, and she works out with her theraband exercise bands every day doing bicep curls, etc. She hates sitting around…We agreed that it’s best to move around, and that being bored is just not tolerated. Gosh, she was great. I told her…”I hope I live to be 90.” I love conversations like that with random strangers, because suddenly, they aren’t strangers anymore.