My Criminal Minds Bad Guy in the Yard dream

This dream starts off in a beautiful house, with a lovely front porch, big kitchen, living room, fireplace….you name it, it’s got it.  I am there with my family, and my bodyguard/boyfriend (or are we married?) Detective Hotch from Criminal Minds BAU unit.  Oh, and kids…there’s lots of kids in the house.

Suddenly, a news report comes on my lovely flat screen tv built into the wall of my kitchen.  There is an APB out for a man who kidnapped and killed an older couple and stole their camper.  He is suspected of being in our area and is armed and dangerous.

2 of the kids had just left to run across the block to go to a neighbors, so naturally when we saw this, I decided I needed to go get them.  On the way, I hear a muffled voice crying, and look to my right, and the suspect has one of the girls on the grass, his hand over her mouth.  He’s telling her to be quiet and he does not like to hurt children.  I yell to him “Hey, asshole!  You want someone?  Come and get me!”  So, he does, and he’s got a knife.  Well, it’s actually more like a sickle, since it’s a curved blade.  With it held to my head, and his arm firmly around my neck and shoulder area, we move to my porch and the front door.

He yells for Hotch….”Hotch…I got your wife!  You come to the front door, or I will cut her face up!”  Hotch tries talking through the intercom system first, but to no avail.  Finally he comes to the door, and ends up trying to take a shot, but the bullet would not penetrate the glass on the door.  (Damn bullet proof glass!)  We continue to stand outside the door, the sickle to my head.  Whatever he wants, he won’t let me go until he gets it.

I remember him telling the girl he doesn’t like to hurt children, so I use that to my advantage.  “You cannot hurt me, or kill me.”  I said.  “I have all these children to take care of.  There are 10 of them in there depending on me, the youngest of which is 1 year old.  If you hurt me, you will be hurting them.  Do you really want to hurt those 10 children?”  I kept driving that into his head.  Finally he said he would let me go, if he could get some food…he wanted supplies of what he called mood food.  He needed to feed his mood, and he needed to get out of there, so he wanted to be completely ignored, so he could go off in the camper and find more old people to kidnap and kill.

Just as I was prepared to enter the house, I hear a thud behind me.  He had been shot with a slingshot that another kid had, and  felled by a big rock to his back.  He was then hauled away by the BAU.

Inside, I got a card from Hotch, with 2 tickets to the mountains.  I saved a bunch of people that day, and I take care of all these kids so we were going away for a weekend.

Oh, life is good when you are married to Detective Hotchner.

Yes, I had cheese before I went to bed last night.



My Criminal Minds, I Got An Apartment Dream

I dreamed I was in an episode of Criminal Minds.  It was a particularly disturbing episode.  I was playing a Doctor….a therapist of some sort for the department, but I also helped investigate.  At one point I was assisting Reed.  It seems he had been drugged and woke up in the morning with a character played by Lily Tomlin.  She claimed they had a one night stand, during at which time her friend went missing.  She had several texts stating as such.  Reed, of course, did not believe that he had any relations with this person, but did agree to assist her in finding her friend.  In the meantime, together we were going to work on finding out who this Lily Tomlin character really was and why she would claim such things.  Could it be that she was the one that drugged him?

Cut to having lunch with my sister when I get a page from Hotch regarding his son.  We have to go find him.  Eventually we do find the boy, and I end up counseling him and his dad both.  Whatever it was involved a man in a black sedan.  While I am counseling Hotch, a wealthy looking woman comes in demanding that Hotch goes to dinner with her.  She assumes I am his girlfriend and insists I must wear a dress if I am to attend.  I informed her I do not wear dresses, and I am not a girlfriend, but rather am a Doctor.  She insults my wardrobe, and my pierced cartilage on my ear, and says “What kind of Doctor dresses like that?”  I was wearing jeans, a tank top and a jacket.  She then says “If you do not wear a dress you will not attend with me!”  I said “Well, listen lady, I don’t know who the hell you are, but if you don’t like my piercing, you sure as hell won’t like my tattoos.”  I then told her I was a Psychologist and insinuated she should go screw herself, because nobody would want to do that for her.

Then, I am at an apartment, and the landlady shows up to collect the rent.  It was a very nice apartment, but I had no idea what I was doing there.  You see, I have a nice house already.  So, I explain to her there must be some mistake, because I have no clue why I am there.  She said “The rent is 600 dollars this month.”  I said “Well, come back later, when the people that really live here might be home, because I don’t even know where I am.”